Miss Julie’s Notion

“Okay, class, settle down, now.” Miss Julie smiled and silently screamed on the inside for the third time that day–and it was only nine.

“John, put that away.”

“Margaret, why are you taking out your math book? I said to take out a piece of paper.”

“Yes, Michael, I’m sure today is Friday.”

“Your rabbit had babies last night? That’s nice, Travis… Oh, then she ate three of them… That’s gross. No, I don’t want to see a picture of them.”

“Can everyone settle down, please?”

“Miss Julie?”

“Yes, Mrs. Powers?”

“Principal Howard would like to see you after school.”

“Thank you, Mrs. Powers.”

“Class… class… No, I’m not being sent to the principal’s office. Well, yes, he is the principal, but… Class, pull out a blank sheet of paper, please.”

“No, Holly, it doesn’t matter if it’s lined paper or not.”

“Yes, Hunter, you have to take this, too.”

Miss Julie leaned against her desk and closed her eyes. “I am going to count to ten. Anyone not sitting quietly in their seats–your seat, not anyone else’s seat–with a blank piece of paper–any paper–and a writing utensil–anything you can write with–on their desks will be sent to the principal’s office–now, not after school. Everyone understand?”

One.

Two.

Three.

Four.

Five.

Six.

Seven.

Eight.

Nine.

Ten.

Miss Julie opened her eyes and silently screamed. Four students in their seats, three sitting on the floor ready to write on their seats, two looking out the window, one trying to sneak out the back door, and she didn’t want to know what Michael was doing in the back of the classroom near the plant.

“First word in this week’s spelling test… notion. As in, I have a notion to pack my things, leave my keys on the desk, go out to my car, drive to the nearest grocery store, buy their entire supply of peanut butter and chocolate ice cream, then go home, eat until I puke, then start looking for a new job in the morning. Notion.”

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